Relational Dialectics

               Relational dialectics can be defined as “tension, struggles, and general messiness of close personal ties” (Griffin, Ledbetter & Sparks, 2015, p. 137).  Chapter 11 does a fine job of describing relational dialectics as a “tug-of-war” of sorts; we as humans, are always being pulled together and pushed apart in our relationships (Griffin, Ledbetter & Sparks, 2015). 

                I believe that gender and cultural aspects do play a part in relational dialectics.  For example, external dialectics involves the recurring tensions between a couple and their community (Griffin, Ledbetter & Sparks, 2015).  A gay couple in a small community in a state that still does not support gay marriage will feel a lot of cultural tension between themselves and the community they live in.  The gay couple has the right to marry and be together, but that is against the cultural norms of some people in the community.  Therefore the couple’s openness may be limited when they go out in public, maybe to avoid persecution or rude comments by their fellow community members.  It is unfair, but these may be some of the consequences that the gay couple might have to deal with.   They may try to conceal their romantic relationship or, on the other end of the spectrum, they may try to use their relationship as a revelation to the traditional community.  Perhaps this couple is the first gay couple that the community has encountered.  This couple could be creating change in the community by showing the community new cultural norms of romantic relationships in a progressive world.  The community may not take to it positively because it disrupts the stability and traditions of the community, but the couple will keep trying to ease tensions between themselves and the community.   

References

Griffin, E. A., Ledbetter, A., & Sparks, G. (2015). A first look at communication theory (9th ed.). New York: McGraw-Hill.